*Trigger warning: talk of suicide

In a world that is constantly connecting with one another, it is no surprise that people with Autism are struggling at an alarming rate. Autism can cause people to feel as though they cannot connect with another person. Autism can cause people to feel isolated socially. Autism can cause people to struggle with communication.

A study recently done in 2017, by Sarah Cassidy, found that 2 out of every 3 people with Autism have thought about suicide as an option or had suicidal ideation. It also found that 1 in every 3 people on the Spectrum have attempted suicide. This rate is alarming.

Why is suicidal ideation so hard to detect in Autistic people? It is hard to detect because of a few reasons. First, people are not asking the right questions. If you ask an Autistic person if they have plans of hurting themselves, they may answer no. If you ask that same person if they have plans of killing themselves, the answer may be yes. It is all in the wording. When dealing with suicide in people with Autism, direct, easy to understand questions must be asked.

  • Are you planning on killing yourself?
  • Do you have the supplies or means readily available to kill yourself?
  • Do you have a day, time, place picked out?

If they can answer yes to those questions, they need help. However, it is important that the proper steps be taken. Explain to them at each step of the process what you are going to do and what will be expected of them.

Here is an example:

“I am worried about your safety because you are planning on killing yourself. We can go to the hospital together to get you help or I can call an ambulance. What would you prefer?

When we go to the hospital, they will ask you the same questions that I asked you. It is important that you answer honestly. Then they will take you to a room. In the room, you will probably have a roommate. They will take away anything that you might use to kill yourself to keep you safe. You are not in trouble. They want to help you.

The doctors will go over your current medicines and may give you something to help you feel better. They will give you something that will help you feel relaxed and not anxious or depressed.

They will most likely have you stay at the hospital for 3 days, to make sure you are safe. You are not in trouble. You may not be able to make phone calls or they may have specific times to make phone calls. The nurses will come and check on you. They may take some blood, check your temperature, or check your blood pressure. They may also have you go to group therapy where you will talk about your thoughts and feelings. The doctors and nurses are there to keep you safe.

When you feel better and the doctors believe that you can be safe by yourself and not kill yourself, they will let you go home. They will probably recommend that you see a counselor or go to an intensive outpatient program. This is to keep you safe and help you not kill yourself.”

By going through the steps, step by step, you will minimize the anxiety that the Autistic person may feel. They will be more willing to accept help if they know what will happen.

The second reason that Autistic people are more at risk is that we face communication and social barriers. Sometimes having Autism feels like living life in a steamy shower. You can sort of see through the fogged glass but even if you wipe the glass with your hand, the picture is never quiet clear.

Many Autistic people feel like they are living life on the outside of society. Autistic people who have fewer visible struggles are particularly at risk (aka the people neurotypical people say don’t “look” autistic). We feel like we don’t fit in with neurotypicals but we also don’t fit in the Autism community. It can feel really hopeless at times, stuck between two worlds.

In cases like this, it is particularly important to build up a small social network. Find people who have the same interests as you and start to build friendships. It is not easy but it is important. For some that may mean going to a soccer game once a week. For others that may mean asking someone to join their D&D team.

Suicide is scary for everyone involved. Dealing with the thoughts that come with it is even more terrifying. People with Autism are between 3-37% likely to have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. OCD often comes with obtrusive thoughts. So if you add the communication barrier, the social barrier, and obsessive obtrusive thoughts, you may very well end up with an Autistic person who can’t stop having suicidal thoughts.

These thoughts become obsessive and obtrusive. The person cannot stop thinking about how lonely they are or how they just want to die. As you can guess that is a dangerous mix. That is why, if a person discloses to you that they are having suicidal thoughts it should be taken seriously and they should get help.

Counseling is a great way for people to learn to identify and regulate their emotions and learn coping mechanisms to stay safe. A great resources for finding a therapist or counselor is psychologytoday.com

Please remember that every life is precious and everyone has a purpose and place in this world. If you are feeling hopeless or suicidal, please call a friend or the suicide hotline at 1-800-273-8255.